~ my thoughts on marriage & contentment ~

I have always considered myself low-maintenance--I don’t need much to be happy. Give me family, friends and books, and I’ll be set. However, as I’ve gotten older, I’ve discovered little areas of my life that bug me. I want to get better grades. I want my skin to clear up. Little things like that, not huge, I-hate-my-life type of things. My biggest desire, however, is love. I want to grow up, get married, have kids and write books from home. That is all I’ve ever wanted, and for as long as I’ve been old enough to think about it, that’s what I’ve believed will make me content. 

On the other hand, as I’ve grown and matured, my thinking towards the subject of marriage has changed greatly. I believe it began when I read Emotional Purity - An Affair of the Heart by Heather Arnel Paulsen. The author stated, “When you don’t rid your heart of discontentment before marriage, it’ll begin to creep up within your marriage. When you look to anything but God to bring you contentment and happiness, you will always be disappointed.” (pg 69.) 

This statement changed how I viewed marriage and contentment and my belief that they went hand-in-hand and instead, I began to see examples of real marital love everywhere. My mom told me that love--true love--is not an emotion. Yes, it starts that way, as an overwhelming, all-consuming adrenaline rush, but it doesn’t stay that way. True love is an action; something you do. You have to choose to love. 

That’s what wedding vows are for. You don’t say “I do until we fall out of love.” You say “I do, until death do us part.” On your wedding day, you are vowing to choose to love your spouse every day for the rest of your earthly lives--even when you’re mad at them or they’re mad at you. If we based our actions on feelings (I admit, like I and most of the female population does) our entire world would be a hot mess and no couples would ever stay together. We need to rely on God, not our spouses, to be our savior. If we rely on fellow humans to satisfy our desires, we are often going to be left unfulfilled. Humans fail, time and time again. We fall short of the glory that God predestined us for (Romans 3:23). That is why we must rely on Jesus to fulfill us and satisfy our desires. With Him, we find contentment, and we must strive to choose Him every day.


thanks for reading babes <3

-em