qualities to look for in a best friend

- some thoughts on -

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Growing up, I didn’t have many friends. I was more of a loner, and I stayed that way until 6th grade or so. Then I met a girl who I considered my middle school best friend. I didn’t have anybody to compare her to, so I wasn’t sure as to whether or not she was treating me as a friend should. Looking back, I’m extremely grateful that that friendship is no longer continuing. She was controlling and, quite frankly, rather mean. She did a lot of things that weren’t pleasing to God including participating in gossip, lying, and being immodest, and I realize now that her behavior was shaping mine and I was becoming a different version of her. This draws my mind to the verse that says “Do not make friends with a hot-tempered man, do not associate with one easily angered, or you may learn his ways and get yourself ensnared.” (Proverbs 22:24-25.) While this verse is talking about anger, I believe that it can also prove as wise counsel when dealing with other ungodly characteristics. On the other end of the spectrum, there’s a verse that says, “he who walks with the wise grows wise” (Proverbs 13:20a). 

I’m not saying to be friends with someone only if they’re perfect; after all, no such human exists. We all make mistakes and screw up sometimes (or a lot of times, if you’re someone like me). However, I believe that if you are daily attempting to live like Jesus, and your efforts SHOW (you’re not just saying “I’m working on it” or “I’m trying”), you are somebody I want to be my friend. I believe that having a close friend to help keep you accountable and encourage you is very important (Proverbs 27:17). Similarly, I believe that a good best-friend quality is being able to listen, not just talk/give advice (James 1:19), even though someone who is wise and will be able to provide wise counsel is ALSO a good thing. On the more laid-back side, I think it’s important to share a sense of humor with your best friend and that they’re able to make you laugh (and vice versa). I’ve also always looked for someone who is spontaneous and likes the same activities as me (for example, my best friend and both really enjoy swing dancing, so we go to a lot of dances together). Most importantly, however, I believe that the most important quality in a friendship is trust; someone that you know will keep your secrets and is the first person you turn to to confide in. After all, Proverbs 18:24 says, “A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”

happy monday, babes <3 

xoxo

-em

p.s. comment down below & let me know who your best friend is! (or, if you have a group of besties, feel free to put their names down too :))